Sunday, January 30, 2011

That's ok...I'll carry your heavy printer...



I think its awesome that strong customers do not even offer to help carry their huge printer box up to the front of the store. Where are all the gentlemen customers at?

Jordan

Saturday, January 29, 2011

Don't ask twice if you do not want to hear answer twice

Customer came in a while back and asked me what was the difference between two GPS units. The only difference in this case was the screen size. The customer then asked me again the same question so I responded innocently with the same exact answer. The customer then lectured me about how it was wrong to insult my customers by repeating stuff twice... after he was the one who asked the question twice?!?!?!?!?!!

Jordan

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Rip you a new....


Customer incident that happened to my co-worker Matt tonight. Guy who bought a $69 TV a month ago is angry because its a cheap piece of crap. Fun times. bahahahaha! Rip you a new asshole...how creative this customer was with his threats.

This brings up the finer point of how exactly does one rip a new asshole? lol.

Jordan

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

"The Creepy Kiss" (animated)

video


Ah Flash its been too long. Quickly animated "The Creepy Kiss" using Flash. Its pretty rough. Took me about 30 minutes or so. More refined stuff to come in the future. Based off of previous cartoon about the creepy customer who blew me a kiss.... (throw up in mouth).

Jordan

Oldie but goodie...


Found this on my old hard drive... I did this sketch in 2008 when I worked at Staples in Burbank, CA during back to school time!! That's a real image I took of our store in the background. The line for check out went all the way to the back of the store. Ah... the early days of retail.... I was sooo innocent...lol

I got so tired of pointing to where stuff was by the end of the night.


Jordan

Monday, January 24, 2011

Give me my keys!


I reached back into my memories of customer horror stories and found an incident that happened to me 2 years ago when I worked at a Beverly Hills Hotel in valet.

It was 2am and I was about to head out for the night when a drunk customer came up to my stand and demanded his car keys and for his car to be brought up for him. I informed him that we could not do that because he was drunk and we would even give him a hotel room at a pro-rated rate for the night. He was angry and called the LAPD. Silly customer.


Jordan

Do you work in the electronics department???


Working in an electronics store I get this a lot. "Do you work in the electronics department?"...."Why yes sir considering the whole store is nothing but electronics!"

Jordan

Saturday, January 22, 2011

You there! Read this for me!


Customer incident that happened to my co-worker Stephanie today. Customer made her read the back of a coffee bag because they left their glasses in the car. lol. I had two different drawings for this incident. Strangeness!!

I thought the fact that a customer would almost expect an associate to gauge out their own eyes to let them use because their glasses were in the car was appropriately realistic. lol.

Jordan

Creepy customer blows kiss.....yuck



Creepy old customer blew a kiss at me..... @&!@*!&@(!!!!!!! yuck. yuck. yuck. (throw up in mouth, vomit on the floor.....etc)

yuck. (shutter throw up some more...)

Jordan

Friday, January 21, 2011

welcome to my home


It is funny how some "pineapple" customers act like you are walking into their "territory" when they walk into your store. It's like a customer walking into your home and they get angry because you greet them? Hello? You came onto my turf, do not act angry or surprised when I greet you.

Jordan

Monday, January 17, 2011

hunting prey...I mean...greeting customers

This is what it feels like to be a sales associate greeting customers. Customers are like antelope, if they see you approach they will run. There is a technique in greeting customers and it involves being as creative and stealthy as possible.

Remember they are on your turf and you know the shortcuts.


"Customers are skittish creatures!"


Jordan

I do not talk politics

I find it interesting when customers find the need to speak to me for 30 minutes about politics. I am neutral in the whole subject of politics. I think politics is nothing but arguing back and forth and honestly I'm an easy going person and like to avoid that sort of thing. lol. I have my views but I like to keep them to myself. This guy was in the market for a new printer but felt the need to release his views on politics to me, who just wanted to do my job and sell him a printer. Is that too much to ask?

Jordan

Sunday, January 16, 2011

Talk to my lawyer


Here is my co-worker Sandra's customer episode that happened the other day. Guy comes in trying to return a portable DVD player. Sandra informs him that we have to test it first to make sure it still works. The customer gets angry claiming that "you can't do that without my lawyer present" and saying stuff like "I can't talk to you without my lawyer." hahahahaha epic!

silly customers! :)

Jordan

You people? You people?


Customer came up to me and asked, "Do you people fix printers?"....you people? you people? what is that? He said it like we were a different breed of human...

-Jordan

Retail Zombie



What Customers envision Salespeople as.


Jordan

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Strange conversation while applying for Credit


In my journies as a Retail Servant I get a lot of talkers. I do not mind talking with most of them, but it is the rare few that provide too much information and go off on tangents that makes it hard to endure.

This happened to me as I was going through the credit application process with a couple. I have to ask all these questions regarding their personal information and some go off on tangents....

Jordan.

this is not a register.

This happened to my co-worker Stephanie. Customer walks up starts setting quarters on
the security desk then asks, "Wow. What are you doing here?" ??????

Stephanie then informs that she can not pay there because it is not a register and that it why it is located strangely.

Jordan.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

My Ancestor in the Caveman Era...


Continuation of the "My Ancestor" series.

Jordan.

3D Glasses fail....




Customer occurrence that happened to my co-worker Carolyn while selling TV's. Guy kept wiggling the 3D glasses trying to get it to "work".

Jordan.

"Where are all the plugs?!?!?!"

I witnessed/was asked the greatest thing I have ever heard in my 4 years of Retail yesterday. This lady with her kid comes up to me and is trying to locate an extension cord or "plugs" that her son could play with. Meanwhile, her demon son is going freaking crazy... I end up showing her the surge protectors which she is pleased that we have. She gives it to her son who starts playing with it. Later... he runs around the store shouting, "Where are the plugs?!?!?" while the mother tries to lie to him that "we do not have plugs." hahahaha.... an electronic store without plugs, this kid is not stupid!







It was definitely a "you had to be there" type happening to really truly appreciate it. lol.

Jordan.

Monday, January 3, 2011

My Ancestor Series: The Pilgrim Era


I have started a new series of drawings I would like to entitle, "My Ancestors". Today we have my ancestor in the Pilgrim Era who is a Retail Servant at Turkey City.


Jordan.

Sunday, January 2, 2011

"Top 7 Hints a store might be closing for the night"



This happens every time that I close.

Here's non slide show format:



















Saturday, January 1, 2011

Happy New Year 2011!!!

I look forward to my first angry customer of 2011.... I might even throw confetti!

(click image to make larger)

Jordan

2010 Clearance Event!

Happy New Year!

(click image to make larger)

Jordan

Yes, master.

This is how some customers, the rude mean pineapple ones, envision the whole shopping process...

(click image to make larger)

Jordan